Feb 17 2013

Patience Is The Key To Maturity

These things I plan won’t happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, do not despair, for these things will surely come to pass. Just be patient! They will not be overdue a single day!

Habakkuk 2:3

There is instant saving, by accepting Jesus as my personal Lord and savior.  But, there is no instant maturity. There is no instant growth – especially not the strong growth that I expect. There are many things I need to get rid of in my life:

  • Anger issues: I need to restrain myself when I’m angry because the zoo comes out when I do. I forget what I’ve learned and became instantly stupid.  This is costly, especially for my relationships with others, especially with my wife.
  • Tact issues: I tend to speak my mind, but that is not a good thing all the time. In fact, I best serve others but holding back, because I’m not even correct most of the time!  I make mistakes and shouldn’t compound it with a motor mouth.
  • Lust issues: My thoughts can run wild – it’s a struggle a man always have. The devil always tells me it’s part of being the male species. However, I don’t have to give in to it. Thoughts may come, but I won’t (and can’t) let it take action!
  • Worry issues: I can be a perfectionist, at times. I care too much, sometimes about things that don’t matter. Instead of focusing on the priorities and what matters most (like God and family), I focus on the trivial issues like work, friendship, or politics.
  • Dishonesty issues: I won’t lie, but sometimes lie is the way to get out of embarrassing situations, for myself or for my family.  I also use half-truths, which is still a lie. I’ll also include ignorance as a self-imposed lie.  This is the devil’s handiest tool to stifle my growth. I must be completely honest to God and to others.

I’ll hang on to God’s promise that He’ll transform me, slowly. I want to grow like an oak tree, not a mushroom. Strong and majestic is my goal. With Jesus as my role model, I’m slowly getting there!

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Oct 17 2010

Going the Distance

Published by under Saddleback Church

To get to where I want in life, there are a few more steps I have to do.

I have to identify the issues and barriers preventing me from reaching my potential or goal. I have to know what’s stopping me.  I have to ask why am I not there yet.  Who or what is holding me back.   I know family obligations are my anchor in proceeding with my ministry.  Dividing up the time between work and home is a challenge.

Then I’ll need to make a step by step plan on how to get where I want.  How do I intend to get there?  It’s no point for me to do everything all at once. I must do something first things first.  It’s a quite difficult thing to write down by step by step plan, as I’m unsure what to do in my case of the family holding me back.  First thing I have to do is definitely pray about it.

Going through my plan will require patience and persistence.  So with the family obligations, I believe I need to wait for my wife to grow in spiritual maturity. There are just so many trust and faith issues that I have to deal with.  It’s best that I let God work His grace on both of us.  Never give up on expecting God’s provisions on us.

I’m also not alone in this struggle.   I will need to get my friends involved.  Since I’m in a new city, it’s difficult to find a “best friend” I can confide with.  But I am in a small group bible study that can provide support. Even though they’re limited in what they can do, they can provide prayer and share their experience.

Finally, I need to pay the price.  This is the ultimate scary moment for me.  I need to know at what cost is God’s ministry?  What am I willing to give to others?  Will it be worth it?   It’s God’s commandment to help others so it will be worth it.  My most valuable resource is my time, so that will be my sacrifice in order to reach my goal.

Lord, thank you for making it clear that I have to help others and set it as my goal in life.  You expect me to do this, so I’m confident you will show me the way.  Open the path, God. Remove the barriers. I have my step by step list, but let your will be done first.  Let my faith grow as I wait for the answers.  Thank you for the small group support.  I’m willing to pay the price.  Please use me and give me the courage to say Yes to you, Lord.  In your name I pray.  Amen.


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Apr 23 2010

My Spiritual Life

Published by under Ephesians

I’m not sure how often I should ask myself where I’m at with my spiritual life. I have a feeling I have to check every day – even every waking minute!  It’s important I’m always in step with God’s purpose for me.  It’s important that my walk is with Jesus (Ephesians 1:11-12).

It’s important that I show it!

In the morning, I wake up to a challenge with my family, constantly testing my patience.   I drive to work and constantly testing my ability to be kind and calm.  I get to work and constantly testing me holding together my Christ-like behavior.

And the recycle repeats every day.

It’s hard to compartmentalized my spiritual life.  I can’t just put it aside.  It IS my life.  I need to spend more time praying.  I need to spend most of my waking hour talking to God.

I can’t let go of Jesus because He’s the reason I have a spiritual life.

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Apr 02 2010

Speaking Up

Published by under 2 Timothy,Colossians,James

The one thing I struggle most is figuring out when to speak up.  All sorts of things go into my mind when I hear something I don’t like.  Unfortunately, most of them are anger.  Anger about the unfairness.  Anger about the injustice.  Anger about the lies.

I have to figure out why I’m feeling angry.  Is it for selfish reason?  Is it my ego or pride being hurt?

Or is it because injustice is happening to other people?  Other people’s rights are being trampled?  Others are hurt, secluded, discriminated, or extorted?

There’s the difference: It’s not about me.  If I think it’s going to benefit many people that I speak up, then I must do that.  But I must do so in truth, kindness, and gentleness.  I must not succumb to fear and anger, because it’s not what God wants me to do (2 Timothy 1:7).

I speak up to represent God’s light – to lead the world to Christ.

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

James 1:19-20

But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.

Colossians 3:8-10

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Mar 17 2010

Getting Past My Troubles

Published by under Proverbs

When I had an arguement with my wife last week, I was desperately trying to find an understanding that didn’t exist between us. I was so lost. She didn’t help by throwing away her faith because the hurt and anger clouded her. I felt hopeless.

At times like this is when I hold onto God’s promise to give me clarity (Proverbs 3:5-6) and hope. The only way is to continue to God will give us both the understanding that we both needed. I constantly prayed God to strengthen my faith eventhough it seemed hopeless. I also didn’t forget His kindness and thanked Him during this time of trouble.

We are now past our troubles. God is good!

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Mar 27 2009

Dealing With Anger

Published by under Galatians,James

One of my worse personality flaw is my quickness to anger.  I was brought up in a realtively dysfunctional family, and my parents are not readily there to guide me in the ways of patience and humility.  They were not Christians back when I was growing up.   We are Christians now and we’ve been taught many times to keep our angry words and thoughts at bay.  The bible says:

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

James 1:19-20

God certainly doesn’t want me to be angry at another, let alone antagonize others.  I must first listen to God, listen to others, and listen to my own heart.  I need to let the spirit of God guide me.  The fruits of the spirit is love, gentleness, patience, and self-control.  It’s what I have to attain to deal with my anger issues.

Thank you, Lord, for filling my heart and mind with your holy spirit.  You know how many times I had burst in anger, being disrepectful, and hurtful to others.  Please forgive me, Lord.  Your kindness and patience towards me exemplifies what I have to do to others.  Guide me, as always.  Fill my heart with gentleness.  Give me the strength to gain self-control.  Provide me the gift of discernment and quick thinking to know the difference between right and wrong.  Let your words flow in me, and in all of us.  Amen.

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Feb 12 2009

Impulsive and Uncontrolled

Published by under 2 Timothy

a)krath/v (akrates)

  • without self-control, intemperate

Being impulsive and uncontrollable are the two main reasons why we’re all in a credit crisis like this: I want to get the latest gadgets!  I want to get a shiny new car! I want to buy a bigger house! More bling bling, as they say.

Patience is the antidote to impulsiveness. God is very good at patience. He’ll wait my lifetime to turn me around. He’ll wait to see me grow up. Whatever it takes, God will show me self-control.

For people will be… without self-control…

2 Timothy 3:2-3

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Mar 02 2008

Putting reconciliation to the test

Published by under James,Job

Last night, I got to put to the test what I had learned for the past week on how to reconcile. Out of all the people, it had to be Yantie.  She didn’t like my tone when I talked to her, and we got into a major argument over a minor misunderstanding.  The words that she used were painful and hurtful. She did it because she felt the same way about me yelling at her.  I felt like Job being put through the test.  It felt like the end.  I didn’t have any other choice but to plead for God’s help in keeping our marriage together.  I had to offer peace offering and begged to reconcile our differences.   I had to absorb my pain, as she did, when she gave me another chance.  I didn’t want to waste our relationship and I agreed on being quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.  I also vowed not to raise my voice to her again.

I must remember this day.  It’s the day that reconciliation is the key to any resolution in conflict.

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Feb 28 2008

Reconciliation – part 2

To summarize, to reconcile with others, I must first surrender to God and rely on Him for wisdom and patience. Now, it’s my turn to step out of my comfort zone and extend a peace offering. I must now invite the person I’m having a conflict with, to a meeting. A face to face meeting is preferable. I must not fear this. Fear gets me defensive and demanding. Better to humble myself and intentionally want to resolve the issue. My humility also starts by confessing my part of the conflict. I must know and admit that I’ve done something wrong (even if it’s a small one) before trying to resolve any conflict. I have to apologize for thinking only about myself.

Once I get over myself, I must then listen for other’s hurt. I have to treat people with respect and dignity. I must be able to look at him/her in the eyes. I must also be helpful and understanding.

Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.

James 1:19

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Nov 15 2007

Problems have their purpose

What problem in my life has caused the greatest growth in me?

The Purpose Driven Life, p. 200

Searching through my memories, I can only come up with the unemployment experience as the defining moment of my life. But one incident is not enough to keep me growing. I know God has let many of life problems happen to me so that he may test my patience. I know this because the bible said in Romans 5:3-4 (NIV)

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.

I recalled what happened in Feb 2005 when we tried to move to Orange County from San Diego. We had difficulties with the title companies, not responding quick enough to close escrow. Yantie was pregnant and very irritable. My real estate agent had his hands tied. We were at the mercy of the people who process the escrow paperwork. I remembered going to one of the title company in Aliso Viejo and my car’s MP3 player it was playing Jars of Clay‘s song “I’m in the Way“:

you sit and stare out at the sky
and think of ways to fake a smile
but life is never what it seems
sometimes it only takes a while

i’m in the way of fallin’ down
i won’t let you go that far now
i’m in the way of fallin’ down
i won’t let you go that far now

i won’t let you go

you think that hope was left behind
i picked it up a mile ago
i am running close behind
so don’t give up and don’t let go

God always catches me when I’m falling down. He’s always there when I’m trouble. The song lifted my spirits and reminded me that God would never let me down.

I managed to close escrow on both houses at the same time. My realtor said this was a very rare occasion that I could sell and buy at the same time. It was a timing that could only be achieved by God’s grace.

Now I look forward to my next problem, as it will serve a purpose. God’s will be done on me.

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