Devotional Time with God

We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.

Hebrews 6:12

It’s been almost 2 months since I updated this devotional.  I have been praying to God, but I have not been writing down what I’ve learned.  I admit it’s due to laziness in my part.  I believe laziness is a sin.  In my case, it led to complacency and ultimately a stagnation (and even breakdown!) in my spiritual growth.  I can’t let this happen.

As stated in Matthew 20:6-7, I can’t just sit around and wait for things to happen.  I have to go and do something to get earn my blessings.  Jesus has given me grace when I don’t deserve it.  I have to try and match his effort.  I can’t die on the cross, but I can pick up His cross.

Lord, thank you for the grace you’ve given me.  Thank you for saving my life, even though I don’t deserve it.  I get the message, loud and clear, I have to wake up and follow your hard work to save myself.  I know I can’t do this by myself.  I know you’ve been helping.  Lead me to your living water so I can live another day, with your strength and wisdom.  Amen.

I have friends.  Actually, I have a lot of acquaintances that I call “friends”.  I have a handful of who I truly call friends.  A friend is someone I can connect with.  A friend is someone I can trust.  A friend is someone who knows me (and I know him/her) very well.  A friend is someone I welcome in my house.

God is my friend.  He’s the one I’ve invited to my house.  He knows me very well.  I trust Him, and my family trusts him.  I’ve connected with Him in different levels.

If I meet someone who’s a friend of Jesus, I’ll instantly connect with him/her, too!  Does it mean I’ll invite him/her to my house?  Maybe not immediately, but we can work on that.  Having a mutual friend like Jesus is a solid foundation to start.

As a friend, I have to open up, not only my house, but also my heart to meet the needs of others.  Just as Jesus will do the same to me when he said in Matthew 7:8, “everyone who knows, the door will be open.”

I must welcome my friends.

The Great Commission said:

Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.

Matthew 28:19-20

There are two things I can’t do in heaven:  To sin, and to share the Good News with people who never heard it.  On this earth, I can only share the Good News!  I can only share my stories on how God transforms my life and gave me a new sense of purpose.  I can share how God take control of my life, so I don’t have to fumble and fear my way through crisis.  I have a few crisis in my life:

1. Heartaches with my previous and current relationships.
2. Loss of employment.
3. Struggles in getting good grades in college.
4. Financial setbacks.
5. Death in the family.
6. Politics.

In all of it, God has pulled me through.  God has gave me reassurances that I’m not alone and I have help.  God knows my pain.  He’s there to catch me when I fall.   I’m not perfect and my journey is not complete.  I still don’t have it all together.  I’m still struggling.

God is still using my pain, so I may share my experience with others.  It’s my task!

However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God’s grace.

Acts 20:24

It’s essential for me to forgive others, just as God has forgiven me. It’s not an easy task, but it can be done, with God’s help.  Here are some of the steps I can take:

1. Reveal my hurt.
2. Release the offender.
3. Replace my hurt with God’s peace.

A hurt is no good if I keep it buried in my mind.  I must speak it out to the offender – if not possible, to someone I trust, or write it on a piece of paper.  Bring it out in the open.

Then just simply release the persons who offended me.  I need to tell them I’m hurting because of them, and that I’ve forgiven them.  One suggested way:

You hurt me this way, this way, and this way.  But I want you to know I forgive you because God has forgiven me, because resentment doesn’t work.  I will need forgiveness in the future.  I am releasing you.

And I need to forgive all the time! (Matthew 18:21-22)  When I think about them and they don’t hurt, that’s when I know I’ve released them.

Finally, God’s power is more abundance and effective than mine.  I need to tap into it.  My sheer willpower won’t do it.  Only God can change hearts.  I’ll do my part to forgive and release.  God will work on my heart and those who offended me.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts.

Colossians 3:15

It’s a question that I’ve asked, and heard people asked about.  Being Christian, forgiveness is the hardest concept I have to wrestle with.

I grew up as a skinny nerd, not a strong kid.  I get bullied – a lot.  I grew up dealing with the put-downs, the snow-jobs, the resentment, etc.  One toxic byproduct of this was my propensity to hold a grudge and not being able to forgive.

Now that Jesus is in my life, this attitude is changing.

In Colossians 3:13, it says I have to forgive others just as as God has forgiven me.  It can’t be any simpler than that.

When I think about, having resentment doesn’t do me any good.  Why should I be the one in pain and suffering, sometimes in years, thinking about old wounds?  I have to go on.  Resentment is unreasonable (Job 5:2), unhelpful, and unhealthy (Job 21:23-25). I need to move on.

Furthermore, I need forgiveness for my future mistakes.  I’m not a perfect person. I will make mistakes.  I offer forgiveness because I need to be forgiven, for now and the future.  It’s in the Lord’s prayer (Matthew 6:12).

It is good to be forgiven.  It is better to forgive.

It’s difficult to go through life without being “in control”.  When I have to depend on other people to help me through mundane stuff, it becomes totally unbearable.  My personality is a somewhat of a go-getter.  As much as I can, I create my own opportunities.  If there’s something that I believe I can’t control, I’ll just dismiss it and move on.  So naturally, I bounce through a lot of interests, hobbies, and relationships.  I’m never satisfied.  I’m never content.

I’ve always felt I had never accomplished anything good in my life.  I beat myself up with this feeling.  I felt guilty to having a very short attention span.  I felt lonely.  I felt sorry for myself.

I knew in my heart, this was not a good feeling.  I knew I had to do something, but didn’t know what.  Now that I found Jesus, it became abundantly clear that I wasn’t in control – never will!  He’s in control.  He’s the way, the truth, and the light.  If I just focus my eyes on Him, my purpose is clear.  My life becomes more fulfilling.

There were times that I held back giving up control and it was due to any of these combination:

1. Pride
2. Guilt
3. Fear
4. Worry
5. Doubt

My #1 is pride.  Raised in a rich family, my parents are the boss.  I’m raised to think like them.  It seems like an inherited trait.  I try my best to be the boss of everyone.  Then when I’m not, the other problem occurs:  doubt and guilt.  I would start questioning myself.  I would feel guilty of doing the wrong thing (or doing nothing).  Those feelings confused my life.  I wondered if I’d ever accomplish anything. I lost control.

Thank God for Jesus!  I can give my burdens to Him.  He helps me overcome all pride, guilt, fear, worry, and doubt!

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Matthew 11:28-30

I’ve asked the question before, “What kind of God do I serve?”  Some folks would paint Him as a mean God, full of fire and brimstone.  Another folks would consider Him as a aloof God, so distant and hard of hearing.

The truth is, I used to compare God with my own parents.  My parents are generous, so naturally I considered God is a generous one.  My Dad is also hot tempered, so I thought God got angry a lot, too.

The real truth of God’s character is in the Bible.

God knows my situation.  He knows about my pain, grief, hurts, and struggles.  He knows what I need before I ask him.

God cares about my situation.  He knows that I’m weak and constantly needs help.  God has compassion for me.  He wants the best to happen to me.  He wants to bless me.  I just have to let Him by surrendering my life, and accept Christ as my personal Lord and savior.

Until I understand God’s true character, I can’t completely trust Him.

I get a lot of grief and pain – all sorts of shapes and sizes.  My past relationships have given me grief, by thinking about what I coulda and shoulda done.  I get pain from dealing with my so-called friends and family, which I would harbor to distance myself from a lot of potentially good people in my life.

God works with grief and pain to send wake up calls to me.   I did and said a lot of stupid things.  The grief would surface to remind me that I didn’t have to think about the past.  I just need to learn from it, and not make the same mistake again.   God would let pain happen, but physically and emotionally, to help me understand consequences of my actions.

Inevitably, I’m not in control.  There were times when I took the wheel and be the driver of my life.  I crashed and burned!  Then I would blame God for letting it happen.  Then I realized, it was my fault in the first place.  I didn’t let God control me. Only bad things happen when it was just about me, myself, and I.

Only God has the power to help me change.

I must mourn for my loss of control.  I must mourn for my grief and pain – and let them go.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Matthew 5:4

One of the most difficult question that I’ve asked before is, why does evil exist?  If God is so powerful, why can’t he just get rid of evil?  Why are evil happening to good people?

Many have tried to answer that.  I recognized the common message:  God let evil happen in my life because He wants me to grow spiritually strong.

It’s a question of faith.  It’s easy to trust God when things go right.  But when it goes wrong, it’s very difficult to continue praising and relying on God.  I would always go back to that selfish mode where I was in charge of my life – where I thought I could solve my own problems. I’ll fail when I don’t put my faith in God.

God also let evil happen because it will show me where is God’s fairness:

But I say, love your enemies![s] Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike.

Matthew 5:44-45

Everyone will experience evil.  The difference is, who will buckle in the stress?  When I follow Christ, I learn to draw strength from God’s grace and promise.  I have to remember God is fair and just.  He will provide what I need, and will never test me beyond my abilities.

In the chaos of this world, I know there’s hope in heaven.  I’m keeping God’s promise and grace, that one day I’ll be with Him and evil doesn’t exist anymore in my life.

I often asked God, “What is my purpose in life?”  Many times in this devotional, the common thing God has told me to do is: “Help others!”  Those words have been repeated so many times in the Bible, and in the testimonies of others.

My reminder today is to strive to help others more.

In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.

Acts 20:35

God’s treasure is stored up in heaven.  This means my worldly needs and riches are irrelevant.  God blessed me here, on this earth, to help others.

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19-21

I must focus on heaven.  Less focus on accumulating things on this earth.  More focus on helping others.

Thank you, Lord, for everything you’ve given me.  You’ve given me comfort and joy.  Most of all, you’ve blessed me with the every day needs for me and my family.  Now that I have it, I want to share it with others.  Please grant your wisdom that we may know the difference between compassion and fraud.  Move us in the direction of heaven.  I don’t want to lose sight of you, Jesus.  Amen.