Devotional Time with God

When I had an arguement with my wife last week, I was desperately trying to find an understanding that didn’t exist between us. I was so lost. She didn’t help by throwing away her faith because the hurt and anger clouded her. I felt hopeless.

At times like this is when I hold onto God’s promise to give me clarity (Proverbs 3:5-6) and hope. The only way is to continue to God will give us both the understanding that we both needed. I constantly prayed God to strengthen my faith eventhough it seemed hopeless. I also didn’t forget His kindness and thanked Him during this time of trouble.

We are now past our troubles. God is good!

It’s a question that I’ve heard and asked before.   God’s nature is good, but why does He allow pain and suffering to befall on humans?  We are His creation so wouldn’t we get the best treatment, all the time? Shouldn’t we be protected and safe all the time?  Throughout the bible, God’s people always get the shaft. Adam and Eve learned it the hard way when they ate the forbidden fruit.  Joseph was sold as a slave and thrown in jail because people were jealous and hated his righteousness.  Job was stripped down to nothing and his family was killed.

There are several reasons why God allows pain:

Free Will

For the longest time, I avoided that Jim Carrey movie called “God Almighty”.  I thought the title itself was a bit of a sacrilege and I heard the material was questionable.  Then I checked it out myself recently, and it turned out to be a good movie after all.  The one message that came from it was: God gave us free will, to do whatever we want.

Of course, free will does have consequences.  If misused, it can cause catastrophe, sadness, and pain.  Many times, God has given me the option to either obey or disobey Him.  I’ve chosen to disobey God frequently because I thought I knew better.   Doing the right thing is not always the easy thing.  It takes a lot of faith.  It takes a lot of grace from God.

Get My Attention

I found out that God whispers to me when times are good, and shouts to me when it’s not.   Pain is God’s megaphone.  I’ve been busy with my own life that I forgot about God.  I forgot to set aside daily bible reading.  I forgot about daily prayer.  I forgot about God’s commandments.

Very often I wanted to be selfish.  God then allows pain to happen so that I realize that I need to change for the better.

Sometimes it takes a painful experience to make us change.

Proverbs 20:30

Teach Me to Depend on God

I can’t do everything myself.  I do my best to take care of my family, doing good deeds, and be a lawful citizen.  But most of all, I need God to strengthen me.  I need God to give me grace when I just can’t do it anymore.  I need His mercy to allow me to move on after my mistakes.

Like King David correctly said:

The suffering you sent was good for me, for it taught me to pay attention to your principles.

Psalm 119:71

Minister to Others

The principle is simple:

…when others are troubled, needing our sympathy and encouragement, we can pass on to them this same help and comfort God has given us.

2 Corinthians 1:4

The pain I’ve experience does humble me.  It gives me a new perspective in life.  It makes me more sympathetic.  I must not waste my pain.  I must share how God and I dealt with it.  What I learned is valuable to others.  It’s wiser to learn from the experience of others.  There’s no need for others to experience the same pain as I do.

I’ve always stated in this devotional blog that I have a problem with anger.  In this blog I counted 16 previous posts that mentioned anger.

It’s no coincidence that it’s a popular subject.  Recently, Pastor Rick Warren had 6 Purpose Driven devotionals related to anger.  Apparently it’s a common problem with people.  It’s the #1 problem with our lives.

I jumped in conclusion too fast.  I judged people too harshly.  I didn’t listen very well.

It’s something I have to seriously deal with in my life.   Obviously, I have to the exact opposite to control my anger.

I have to start thinking of other people first.   I have to slow down and give others the benefit of a doubt.  Most of all, I have to listen (not just hear) what others have to say.

The cost of anger is too high.  I must be smart about it and control my anger.

Hot tempers cause arguments, but patience brings peace.

Proverbs 15:18

People with quick tempers cause a lot of quarreling and trouble.

Proverbs 29:22

People with a hot temper do foolish things; wiser people remain calm.

Proverbs 14:17

It’s a subject the mainstream media have already bombarded the youth of America.  The message is clear: sexual freedom.  Anyone is free to have sex whenever they want, whoever they want, and worry about the consequences later (ie. abortion).  The media taught young girls it’s cool to lose their virginity early.  For young boys, it’s a right of passage and a sign of manhood.  In the end, as adults, it’s just part of “growing up”.

For me, I know for a fact, having sex out of context of marriage, was a destructive move.  When both me and my girlfriend were not ready, it brought a lot of emotional baggage.  The future seemed unclear because we were just focused on the moment.  My own parents were not restricting my sexual freedom.  I was allowed to learn my mistakes.  I didn’t get any punishment – only empty warnings.

In hindsight, now that I’m a parent, I need to get involved in my daughter’s search of her sexual identity.  Even though she is 4 right now, I still  have to watch how I treat and influence her.  As a Dad, I represent the man in the family, and let her know men are not the enemy, but also the provider of love and affection.  I must be there when she has questions about boys/men.

These are the things I must insist on my child:

• Two distinct sex: man and woman.  There can’t be same sex dating, let alone marriage!
• Both parents are wise.  Our instructions are valuable, and must be kept in heart.
• Moral integrity.  Biblical principles are important.  No one can turn her away from them.
• Don’t let flesh control our actions.  Avoid perversity.  Be faithful!
• Meet the needs of the spouse.  Be the best companion and friend.

It’s easy to do whatever I want.  Everything is permissible.  God gave us free will.

But, is it beneficial?  Is it right?  Is it according to God’s laws and commands?

Raising a child with a sense of personal integrity is a tough thing to do nowadays.  This world has turned sarcastic and cynical.  The world is teaching kids to speak with a double meanings.  The society doesn’t have a clear standard on what’s right and what’s wrong.  The world teaches there’s really no one to trust – not even God!

I must teach my child to speak carefully.  Listen more, speak less.  When she does speak, she must choose her words carefully.  Always to build.  Always in kindness.  Always thinking.

From a wise mind comes wise speech; the words of the wise are persuasive. Kind words are like honey — sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.

Proverbs 16:23-24

God gave us an instruction manual to follow: the Bible.  We can live our lives with God’s integrity, if I just read it constantly and abide by it.  I have to plant His words in my heart so my private life reflects my public life.

I have to run back to God.  The same goes for child.

It’s human nature to lie.  My inclination is to lie to get what I want.  I don’t tell the truth (or half-truth) to cover up my mistakes or shortcomings.  It’s no different with my child.  She doesn’t have to be taught to lie and she already knows how to do it!

To tell the truth, at all times, is difficult to do.  It’s a discipline.  It requires effort. It requires accountability.  God is watching.

It would be easier if every time I lie, God will send a lightning bolt, or something, to correct me.  However, God does want to bless me, and he won’t do it if I constantly lie.  In fact, He’ll settle the score if I am not repentant.  There will always be a day of reckoning.

A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who pours out lies will perish.

Proverbs 19:9

As a parent, I must model honesty in my family.  Especially to my child.  There needs to be sincerity in all apologies.  There needs to be fairness in all the things we do.

I have to be involved.  I have to engage my kid to ensure she knows I care, and I’m paying attention.   God only wants honest people, and that’s who I want to bring up.

The truth shall make us free.

Emotions are the #1 cause of division in every relationships, and it’s no exception with parents and children.  In particular, anger is not particularly useful in parenting.

Yet, I still find myself raise my voice, feel angry, and scold my child a lot. By nature, I’m hot headed and bad tempered.  I can see it bubble up all the time.  I pray to God that I have the strength to keep my anger in bay.

I have to continue to try my absolute best, to take myself out of emotional situations.  I need to be able to step back, calm myself down, and re-assess the situation.  I need to bring my problems to God and have Him increase the love within me.

I need to set a good example for my family.  I don’t want to end up raising another hot-tempered person.  I don’t want to be an emotional parent.  I just want to be a loving and caring parent.

A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly.

Proverbs 14:29

A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. — Hot tempers start fights; a calm, cool spirit keeps the peace.

Proverbs 15:1,18

A good person’s mouth is a clear fountain of wisdom; a foul mouth is a stagnant swamp. — The speech of a good person clears the air; the words of the wicked pollute it.

Proverbs 10:31,32

Being a parent, God has given me the authority over my child.  However, that does not mean I can abuse that authority.  On the contrary, I have to raise my child to love God and the people around her.

The first step is parent control.  When a child is small, she doesn’t know any better so I have to teach her everything there’s to know about being kind, gentle, forgiving, patient, thinking, helpful, and discerning.

All of that is to equip her to have self control. She is to know what is right and wrong.  She will know enough knowledge to survive in this world.

Ultimately, she will surrender to God because He’s the final authority over her.  God needs to control her.  He sets the commands and laws of our lives.  She’ll need to keep her eyes towards heaven, for that’s where we, Christ followers, will end up.

That’s our purpose in life.

If you plan and work hard, you will have plenty; if you get in a hurry, you will end up poor.

Proverbs 21:5

Earning my money slowly is a discipline. It teaches me good things come to those who wait. God always try to instill patience in me and in money matters, it’s no different. I have a bad habit of seeing something, and when I like it I make an effort to buy it. With things like Amazon 1-click purchase, that’s a dangerous thing. Impulse buying is really acting too quickly with my spending and it will get out of control – fast. The bible warns me about this in Proverbs 10:16

The earnings of the godly enhance their lives, but evil people squander their money on sin.

and in Proverbs 21:20

The wise have wealth and luxury, but fools spend whatever they get.

I am an educated person, but for some reason I tend to spend more. My wisdom must include budgeting, planning my spending, and not squander everything that I have on things that are “On Sale”.

In the house of the wise are stores of choice food and oil, but a foolish man devours all he has.

Proverbs 21:20

Saving money is God’s IQ test for me. Am I smart and wise enough to save money for rainy days? The idea of getting out of debt is first to give to God, then I have to give to myself. The rule is: 80-10-10, or 10% to God, 10% to savings, 80% to paying the bills.

I also have to watch out that I don’t fall into “Get Rich Quick” schemes. Money quickly gained is quickly lost. The love of money is the root of all evil. If I love money, I will use people. If I love people, I will use money.

I’ve been bitten by the envy monster several times in my life. Not only in the workplace for position of power, but also in material things. The “Gotta Have it!” attitude is raging in the media these days, and it’s more apparent here in United States. Americans are more in debt than the Europeans and Asians. It’s no wonder that we’re in debt because we seldom ask ourselves, “Do I really have to have this?” When I hold the envy monster, I will not go crazy on spending my savings.

I must learn the lesson from ants as they constantly store food. When the going get tough in the future, I will be ready when I have savings.